Facing the Giant....

Well, CT scan last week went fine and that day they scheduled me for today for my "trial run" to start the radiation treatments. Everything went fine. It's actually really pretty the way they have the radiation room set up...they have a "tropical theme" on the wall and they even have a water fountain. Guess they try to make you feel as peaceful as possible since you are not supposed to move at all during the treatments (with the exception of breathing of course). Sheila, Jason & Chad took care of me today and will apparently be the same technicians taking care of me in the future. The plan after today was to start radiation tomorrow. I had all my appts scheduled for this week (nothing 12/24 or 12/25) and for next week. Got the child care situation all taken care of as well. However, as we all know, plans can change. And plans did change. I was grocery shopping when Sheila called and said she had just spoken to Dr. Decker. Dr. Decker would rather start my treatments next week in order to start with 3-4 treatments immediately, rather than 2 treatments then 4 days off. Makes some sense to me but must admit I was a little "dissapointed" since I had already scheduled friends to watch the boys and I had already emotionally prepared myself to start this week. I was ready to face the giant this week and get it over with. The idea of radiation treatments has been weighing heavily on my mind. I'm more stressed out about it than I thought I would be. Unfortunately, too, when I get stressed out, I take it out of my family. I don't mean to, but it is just simply what happens. I'm not as happy, calm, or fun to be around...just ask them. I guess God just knew I wasn't 100% ready to start this week...he's not done preparing for this next leg of the journey quite yet! He is so good and I need to remember that everything is done in HIS time, not mine! (Thanks to Benton for the friendly reminder when he walked in a few minutes ago!)

Many of you are probably saying, "How wonderful that I do not need to start treatments Christmas week!". True, but at the same time I just wanted to face this giant in my head and get the process going. Here's another catcher...we obviously have already met our insurance deductible for calendar year 2009. Our new insurance year begins 1/1/10 so any treatments, appts, etc. next year we will have to pay for again until we meet our deductible. In the long run it really won't matter...we'll have to pay our new deductible again no matter what.

So, time for me to readjust my mind, be excited by all the joys and blessings of the Christmas Season, and try to not think about next week until it arrives. Thanks to the following families for being willing and available to help us out this week or next - Fladd family, Wilson Family (x2), and the Spivey Family. You guys are amazing, wonderful people and we are so blessed to have you in our lives!

Time to motivate for another Christmas gathering. This time it's the church choir drop-in at the Wilson's home.

Merry Christmas everyone! May your hearts and homes be filled with the joys and wonder of the Christmas Season!