P's & Q's of Radiation...

P = Painless and Q=Quick...simple as that! I have had 4 treatments this week and so far, so good. I could make the drive to Roper and back again blindfolded by now. I know every bump and pothole on 26 (yes, northern folks...we do have potholes down south too!).

As soon as I arrive at Radiation & Oncology I check in, change into a top gown, and moments later they call me back to the room. I know the routine pretty well now so I go ahead and get positioned as best as I can on the table. The radiation techs adjust me if they need to and then they leave the room. The actually time it takes for the treatment is about 5 minutes, if that. I actually tried counting today...1 one thousand, 2 one thousand, 3 one thousand and came up with about 1 minute. Some of the time is the movement of the machine into different positions. I can't feel anything during the treatment and with the exception of a little tenderness on my left breast, all is good. I need to apply lotion or Aquafor 2-3 times a day all over the treatment area as a precaution to avoid "sun burning" effects.

Apparently the first 3 weeks are a breeze and the 2nd 3 weeks is when I may start feeling the effects...exhaustion, dry skin, scaly skin, and possibly some blistering. So long as I continue to apply the lotion regularly I may be able to avoid lots of discomfort in a few weeks.

I know almost all the techs, nurses, and staff by first name now (imagine that huh?). They are all so kind, funny & friendly. Roper is a wonderful place and it's no wonder why they are the top rated hospital in the area.

We are laying low tonight for New Year's Eve...watching some movies and building a fire in the fireplace. We actually have a wood burning fireplace in our new house. I forgot about how much I love the ambiance of a real fire crackling!

I wish you all a joyous, properous and healthy 2010! Remember again Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Oh yea, yesterday I took a detour home and went to the Earth Fare market on Folly Road. EVERYTHING in there is organic, I mean everything! Pricy, yes, but organic and so fresh! The salmon and broccoli we had last night was outstanding. Both boys devoured it and said they could have that every night. I told them they had to get a job if they wanted to have salmon every night!

Time to chill out and enjoy the rest of the evening with my wonderful family. Happy New Year everyone! Talk to you next year!
Tammy

Facing the Giant....

Well, CT scan last week went fine and that day they scheduled me for today for my "trial run" to start the radiation treatments. Everything went fine. It's actually really pretty the way they have the radiation room set up...they have a "tropical theme" on the wall and they even have a water fountain. Guess they try to make you feel as peaceful as possible since you are not supposed to move at all during the treatments (with the exception of breathing of course). Sheila, Jason & Chad took care of me today and will apparently be the same technicians taking care of me in the future. The plan after today was to start radiation tomorrow. I had all my appts scheduled for this week (nothing 12/24 or 12/25) and for next week. Got the child care situation all taken care of as well. However, as we all know, plans can change. And plans did change. I was grocery shopping when Sheila called and said she had just spoken to Dr. Decker. Dr. Decker would rather start my treatments next week in order to start with 3-4 treatments immediately, rather than 2 treatments then 4 days off. Makes some sense to me but must admit I was a little "dissapointed" since I had already scheduled friends to watch the boys and I had already emotionally prepared myself to start this week. I was ready to face the giant this week and get it over with. The idea of radiation treatments has been weighing heavily on my mind. I'm more stressed out about it than I thought I would be. Unfortunately, too, when I get stressed out, I take it out of my family. I don't mean to, but it is just simply what happens. I'm not as happy, calm, or fun to be around...just ask them. I guess God just knew I wasn't 100% ready to start this week...he's not done preparing for this next leg of the journey quite yet! He is so good and I need to remember that everything is done in HIS time, not mine! (Thanks to Benton for the friendly reminder when he walked in a few minutes ago!)

Many of you are probably saying, "How wonderful that I do not need to start treatments Christmas week!". True, but at the same time I just wanted to face this giant in my head and get the process going. Here's another catcher...we obviously have already met our insurance deductible for calendar year 2009. Our new insurance year begins 1/1/10 so any treatments, appts, etc. next year we will have to pay for again until we meet our deductible. In the long run it really won't matter...we'll have to pay our new deductible again no matter what.

So, time for me to readjust my mind, be excited by all the joys and blessings of the Christmas Season, and try to not think about next week until it arrives. Thanks to the following families for being willing and available to help us out this week or next - Fladd family, Wilson Family (x2), and the Spivey Family. You guys are amazing, wonderful people and we are so blessed to have you in our lives!

Time to motivate for another Christmas gathering. This time it's the church choir drop-in at the Wilson's home.

Merry Christmas everyone! May your hearts and homes be filled with the joys and wonder of the Christmas Season!

Radiation??

Sorry I have not posted anything new to my blog in a few days. For those of you who are on FB and friends with me, you know that I have a ton of information swimming around in my mind. For some reason, the thought of Radiation is terrifying me. Benton and I met with the Radiation Oncologist on Monday, 12/7/09, at Roper Hospital. Her name was Dr. Decker. We both really liked her - very straight forward and to the point. Not too "mushy", "sweet", or "giddy"...just a simple to the point kind of doctor. We went through a ton of questions with her. The biggest question in our mind was "If they apparently got all the cancer in the biopsy and/or lumpectomy, and all the pathology reports from surgery have come back negative, WHY do I need radiation?".

Well, many factors play into the reason why they medically recommend radiation...
1. My cancer was a Grade 3 aggressive cancer;
2. I am young and radiation will greatly minimize the chance of recurrence;
3. I was w/in 1mm of invasion (spreading) of the cancer.

The invasion report is somewhat vague because it was within 1 mm. They can not tell me 100% that it was an invasive cancer but they can not rule it out either. We caught the cancer so early that we caught it before there was any obvious sign of invasion. Make sense? Some days it does make sense to me, others it does not.

Benton and I have received information not only from the Radiologist but also from others who may not necessarily agree with radiation as a treatment option. We have been trying to sort through all the information in our heads to make the best decision for my treatment. We keep coming back to the decision of "let's do both".

Both "treatments" would include radiation and a change of diet/lifestyle. We all know that sugar is bad for our bodies right? Common sense tells us this! We also know that exercise is very important to our health. Again, common sense tells us this. So, why not have the radiation and also begin changing our lifestyle to begin eating healthier and exercising regularly.

The radiation treatment plan would be 5 days a week for 5-7 weeks. Yup, driving from Summerville to downtown Charleston for almost 2 months. Fun? No, not really, but it's my health and my future we are talking about here. Yes, our gasoline bill will increase slightly for those 2 months but if it kills the malignant cells that may be left in my body I think I can handle it. The surgeon's office has also referred me to a Radiologist at Trident (aaaaa!) and I have a tentative appointment there on 12/28/09. Trident is only a 15 min drive for me where Roper is about 30-45 min depending on traffic. I still have my fear of Trident though based on my biopsy experience. Both Benton and I are very comfortable with Roper Hospital so we most likely will stick to that plan.

So that's where we stand folks. No final decision has been made. I continue to pray to God for his guidance and wisdom to make the best decision for me. He is the Great Physician, and he knows what is in store for me. I need to continue trusting in Him and he will guide me through the whole process.

Jeremiah 29:11 - "For I know the plans I have for you" declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Back to Normal...

Well, it's been 2 weeks to the day since I had my surgery. It's as though I turned a corner in the healing process and finally feel almost 100% normal (I know, I know...you are all saying I'll never be normal!). Finally do not have to sleep with a brassiere on any longer! Yea! I'm able to do just about any physical activity with the exception of lifting anything over 5 lbs. and exercising vigourously (bummer huh?). We are finally done with all the leftovers from the delicious meals that were brought to us by our church family. Guess I should start cooking again huh? Mmmm...maybe a good time to try some new recipes!

Next step is meeting the Radiation Doctor next Monday, Dec 7th, for a consult. The Doctor I will meet will either be Dr. Clay or Dr. Decker. Their practice is located within Roper Hospital downtown. I have lots of questions to ask them and I'm sure they will have the answers...how long does a treatment take? Will I be able to "feel" the radiation? Will I be OK to drive myself home afterwards? What are the possible side effects? etc. Lots of new things to think about but again, I'm just so glad that the Lord is in charge!

Got the new house decorated for Christmas and love it. When we were growing up in Medfield my Mom always had the little candles in the windows at night. I've always wanted to do that but never took the time or money to make it happen...until this year! The house looks great! I even put some mini white lights on a few bushes out front. I decorated a plain 30" wreath myself for our front door. I'll get some photos taken soon and post them on my facebook page.

A friend of mine from church just shared that her Mom was recently diagnosed with breast cancer as well. I asked if I could call her and I did. Her name is Shirley and it was so wonderful to talk with her. I was thrilled to hear that she is also seeing Dr. Baron as her surgeon. We shared our experiences together and I was able to tell her what to expect over the next few weeks. I've been praying that the Lord will use this trial in my life to share with others and hopefully help others through the process. That is exactly what Shirley has been praying about too! We both are praying for God to strengthen our faith and hope in him and that he will use our experiences to win others into His Kingdom!

Short post today, time to straighten up the house, finish the laundry and then read some intriguing information on the book of Revelation, ch 15. In closing, let me ask...do you believe in the end times? When the end time does come, where will you go...Heaven or Hell? I will be praying for those I love, both family & friends, that you will receive Christ as your personal Savior and that come the end times, we will rejoice in Heaven together!

What Am I Thankful For This Thanksgiving?

T - TATAS girls!!!!
H - HOPE in HIM, our Almighty Father, Sustainer & Great Physician
A - my ATTITUDE in life
N - NEGATIVE test results
K - KINDNESS of friends & family
S - my SOUL MATE Benton (and also SANDY Fitch - my Mom and inspiration to fight the cancer!)
G - GOD, GOD, GOD, GOD....you get the idea!
I - my IN LAWS, who I love dearly and wish lived closer!
V - VERSES of the Bible that I have the freedom to read and share out loud!
I - INSPIRATIONAL friends, readings and moments in life
N - Our NAMESAKES of Jesse & Dylan
G - the saving GRACE of our Lord Jesus Christ

I wish everyone a joyful, relaxing, loving & blessed Thanksgiving Day! May you take time to reflect on all that you are Thankful for! God Bless you all! Sending this out with tears of joy and thanks in my eyes!
Tammy

Fantastic Follow Up Visit...

This morning I had my post op follow up appt with Dr. Baron. His medical assistant, Jill Neumann, came in first and told me the good news. There were NO CANCER CELLS FOUND AT ALL IN THE SPECIMEN FROM THE LUMPECTOMY & LYMPH NODES!!!!!!! Praise the Lord!!! She could not stop smiling at the good news and I near about burst into tears of joy. Dr. Baron came in and confirmed the same report. My incisions are healing very well and he said they should clear up quite a bit in the next week. No heavy lifting or exercising allowed (bummer huh?). Guess lifting weights is out of the question. I do hope to begin walking again now (hint hint to my new neighbors!!!). Walking will be fine but no running. Can't do anything with major impact, unless I decide to use duck tape around my chest so nothing moves around! NOT!!!

Now, however, because my cancer was a Grade 3 in agressiveness and because the Radiologist/Oncologist confirmed the size of the cancer cell area taken out as almost 7mm, they are suggesting radiation and being on Tamoxophin for 5 years. Tamoxphin is an estrogen blocker. Apparently breast cancer cells are attracted to estrogen, therefore the need to block the estrogen. Man, I'm starting to sound like I really know what I'm talking about now! :)

Yesterday I made 2 batches of my candied pecans and made little gift bags to bring to Dr. Baron's office and to the staff at Roper Hospital. Dr. Baron was so funny when I told him I made him a little something to say thanks. He asked if this was a business I owned - no, just me loving to bake goodies and share them with people. He was glad he could share them with his staff so he didn't need to eat them all by himself!

Next time I see Dr. Baron will be in 6 months for a bi-lateral mammogram to be sure all is fine and that no more cancer has appeared. They asked if I wanted to go back to Trident and I said no way. Roper is the place for me from now on!

After leaving Dr. Baron's office I found my way over to Roper Hospital to deliver more pecans and hugs. I walked into Ambulatory Surgery and immediately saw 3 familar faces...Tanya, Cynthia Saukas, and the other gal from the Breast Care Center. They all came up to me and gave me big hugs. I told them how much I appreciated the superb care I received from them and wanted them to know how wonderful my experience was with each and every one of them. It was so good to see them all and thank them in person (especially when I was not under the influence of meds!). I walked up to Nuclear Medicine and again was greeted by a familar face. I do not remember her name but she was the one who wheeled me back to my room after the radiocative stuff was injected into me last Wed. I asked her if Susan Hartley was there and she went to get her for me. Susan came out with a huge smile and said "HI TAMMY!!". I gave her a goodie bag as well and again simply said thank you for the kind, compassionate, and friendly care I received from her and Dr. Cole.

The cool thing was that apparently all the staff I mentioned in my letter to Roper had already read the letter! Love the fast USMail service! One gal introduced me to someone else as the girl who wrote the blog!

It was so good to revisit Roper today. I told Cynthia that she would for sure see me again in 6 months because from now on all my breast care will be done at Roper. Even my Radiation will be done at Roper too.

I was so excited coming home that I went school early to surprise the boys. I couldn't help but share the great news with them about the cancer being all out of Mommy's body. Jesse was happy, but you know, 4th graders have to be cool in front of friends. Dylan's little face lit up and he gave me a huge squeeze! It was great to see everyone at the school...it had been at least 4 weeks since I had been in there. I love the staff at Fort Dorchester Elementary. So many of them have been praying for me as well. We are so blessed to live in a community where there are many believers in God and Jesus Christ who are not ashamed to say so!

OK, no school tomorrow...we're kicking back and watching movies this afternoon.

Lastly, what am I thankful for the most this Thanksgiving?????....I'm thankful for love, compassion, excellent medical care, laughter, tears, joy, salvation, mercy, and grace!! God is so good, all the time!

How Tough are you Tammy?

Not as tough as I thought. The pain really set in hard last night and I gave in to the pain meds. Before bed I had Benton help me reposition the gauze over the incisions. Gave it a little more cushioning. The incision where they took out the lymph node is the one closest to my arm pit and hurts the most. Probably because there is not so much fatty tissue around it like there is near the other incision. The lymph node incision is about 1 inch long and the lumpectomy incision is about 3 inches long. At least that's what I can tell trying to look sideways and down at my chest when I can't even raise my arm. Even with a mirror it's difficult for me to see it very well. I have been sleeping with some travel pillows under my arm pit for more comfort and that helps. Slept primarily on my right side and then on my back. Actually had a good night's sleep last night but this morning I woke up in lots of pain. Couldn't even walk around the house without holding the pillow under my arm. Thank goodness I have a wonderful husband who helped get the boys up, showered, fed, and out the door for school this morning. As soon as they left I took more pain med and went back to bed for 2 1/2 hours. Just woke up a bit ago. Feeling better and hoping the rest of the day goes by easier than the morning started.

Dear Lord, thank you for bringing me safely through my surgery and for giving the staff and doctors wisdom and compassion towards me. I thank you for being the Great Physician and for being my Sustainer, Strength, Strongtower and Father. I continue to praise you during this storm in my life. I feel the weight and burdens in my head and heart being lifted by you every moment. Thank you for your protection and for the grace and mercy you bestow to me every day! In the name of your glorious Son I pray, Amen.